When Anger Consumes The Christian Woman: An Underlying Problem
What could be the underlying problem when anger consumes the Christian woman?
As a Christian woman, everyone tells you that as long as you pray and read your Bible that everything will be okay.
We are molded in the church to hold up to all of the requirements to be this good and perfect Christian woman. Serve in ministry, marry a good Christian man, homeschool your kids, you got this.
But what about when disaster strikes? What about the moment you feel like you can no longer hold up to all the standards of the Proverbs 31 Woman. The moment when anger consumes the Christian woman.
What do we as a church do to her? Do we shun her? Cast stones?
Are you that Christian woman who is consumed?
There are so many question marks within these last ten sentences because this is a topic that is rarely talked about. But what about when the Christian woman is raw in her reality?
Let’s face the truth Christian women, we don’t always have it together.
You may have been faced with a husband who has just decided to abandon you and your kids.
Maybe, the burden of working a full-time job and carrying the weight of bills, cooking, caring for the house is just too much.
Whatever it may be, I get it, you are angry. And probably really really tired.
You begin to not care what anyone thinks, not your husband, not your kids, not the church. I mean you are even at the point of asking yourself, what’s the point of going to church.
Everybody is just putting on a show anyways. Nobody really cares. Nobody is really this happy.
Your life has really just become a depressing pessimistic reality that would probably make good for its own reality show.
You may like to read: The Peace In The Midst Of A Storm
What you might notice when anger consumes the Christian woman and what could be the underlying problem:
(I am not here to give the obvious solution that most Christian would give the angry woman in disguise because we all know the obvious truth but right now we need to face the problem.)
1. Irritated by every little thing
External: She begins to get irritated by every little thing. I mean even the fast food cashier getting her order wrong is like the end of the world. It may seem little to some people but there could possibly be a bigger problem here.
Underlying problem: She feels that everybody has let her down. That nobody listens to her when she talks. She is losing trust in humanity.
2. Annoyed by noise and loud sounds
External: Every time she hears her kids scream or loud music, she becomes annoyed and feels overwhelmed by all the noise.
Underlying Problem: For so long noise has consumed her life. She kept going and going and never stopped so when the noise doesn’t stop it becomes difficult to hear it. She hasn’t had any time to just sit in silence. When her husband left she still had to face every day. There was no time to just be still.
3. Feels disrespected
External: She tells her child to clean their room or go to bed and the response you get is, “I am doing something or I don’t want to clean my room”. And it keeps happening over and over. Never listening.
Underlying Problem: She feels like she is not heard and that her voice doesn’t matter. When is someone going to respect her?
4. Taken advantage of
External: She goes to the store and decides to get her child a treat and her child asks for something different or complains later that night that “You are mean mom”. Umm, what? I’m mean? Look how much I do for you, she thinks.
Underlying Problem: She remembers her husband coming home at night waking her up at 2 am, asking where dinner is. When she proceeds to tell him she didn’t make dinner tonight, he throws a glass of water on her face and says, “Wrong answer ___”. No wonder why she feels disrespected all the time by everyone everywhere.
5. Feels like God has failed her
External: She looks around and sees that everyone’s needs are being met. She asks God, “Why are you providing for them but not me”.
Underlying Problem: Look at all I have done and this is what I get. She feels like Job. Why is this happening to me, she screams? She feels less than that a God who she worshipped and was loyal to could fail her. That she is not worthy of Him.
External: Everything she does she feels like is not good enough. She keeps doing for people and she is left feeling that people don’t appreciate her. She starts giving up and really loses a sense about being caring for others anymore.
Underlying Problem: She took care of her mom for over a year as her own marriage was failing and was caring for her child at the same time. She took her to the Dr, paid the bills, cleaned, cooked and tried to do as best as she could but needed to care for her own child and repair her marriage.
She was looked at as careless to not continue to care for her mom although she had an older brother who could have stepped in. Her mother calls her a “disappointment” and tells her “you don’t even exist to me”. After everything she did that’s what she gets. She feels if her own mother could write her off then screw everybody else.
The list goes on and on. She feels let down, beat up, unappreciated, disrespected, and invaluable.
This is what it looks like when anger consumes the Christian woman
Is this the truth? Or do her underlying problems have something to do with her anger?
I know I said I wasn’t going to give any solutions but found it interesting that the morning after I started this post, this was the scripture that popped up on my phone and thought I would share it.
Because of the Lord’s great love we are not consumed,
for his compassions never fail. Lamentations 3:22
It’s going to take a lot of work for her heart and mind to get repaired. She once was this loving Christian who wanted to a live a life worthy of praise and is now in a pit of anger, depression, and anxiety.
Must Read: Prioritizing changed my attitude
What would you say to when anger consumes the Christian woman?